Thoughts on Becoming a Writer

I want to be a writer. I've actually always wanted to be a writer. My mom reminded me of that when she was visiting a few weeks ago. But the desire has been growing stronger lately. I'm not sure if it's because I'm reading better writers on a regular basis or if I'm just so bored with my status quo or because I think it's a good way for a lot of people to know me and hear my opinions. Maybe it's because all the writers I follow online get to travel a lot and I want a flexible schedule where I get to travel a lot. What I'm saying is that I'm not sure my motives are all the way pure, but I like to think they are somewhat pure. Maybe God could would use me to speak to people. To do something big in the world. To inspire people to look to him more, do more, love more.

I like to think I'm a pretty clear communicator. I can put ideas across clearly and (somewhat) concisely. I could work on my humor. I just wonder if I have all that much to say. There are a million good communicators out there, why do I think I'm so special? Maybe I need to be a much deeper thinker to have much to say; or maybe you have to be much more vulnerable than I am in this stage of life. These are all things to work on.

But to be a writer you have to write. So for now, this will be my little practice corner of the world. I can build discipline in to my writing, work at it, try to improve and try to find my voice, my stuff to say. I can try to write without worrying so much if people are reading it or critiquing it. Build some confidence in writing because I enjoy it and want to practice and try to ignore the other people for now. It's not that I don't think deep thoughts or have valid stories to share, it's just that I don't really think anyone is interested in hearing them. Also, it's a little embarrassing to go back and see how immature you sound a year later and a blog pretty much lets everyone do that for you.

There are so many good writers in the world. People who think deep thoughts and can pair them with such humor and wit. But they didn't wake up one day and have their craft perfected. (Well, not most of them, right?) So this is me trying to say (for about the fifth time since I started this blog) that I'm going to try to be consistent and move forward with this little adventure. And if all I have left in the end is documentation of my journey through writing, that will still be something.